[I haven’t written anything in months; apologies for wording awkwardness.]

Within days of meeting the vampire, everything in Purgatory became pure; desperation, aggression, exhaustion, relief – it all twined together, completely undiluted by concerns that might have plagued Dean when topside. Purgatory gave Dean plenty of room to act quickly and mercilessly, without leaving space in the aftermath to be plagued by regrets. There was always tension, always pain, but never doubt. And Benny was his guide, saturated with the very essence of their surroundings, quick and burning and as certain as the death they wielded as brothers in survival.

Brothers.

Where Sam would have grown tired, discouraged, and questioning, Benny remained smirkingly upbeat and bright-eyed in his honesty, giving Dean a hand up that came without a passing of judgment in his eyes that Sammy might have given. Benny relied on Dean entirely, but unlike the human’s true brother, he did not dog Dean’s every misstep with doubt. Dean screwed up, Benny stepped in, and they continued without awkward soul-bearing conversations and bitter-edged false assurances; likewise, Dean found himself forgetting Benny’s mistakes just as easily, something he’d never been able to do for his little brother.

Dean had thought, as a Winchester, he knew everything there was to know about loyalty. That it meant swallowing your hate and distrust and frustration and keeping on track no matter how many misgivings had piled between you. But true loyalty – as Benny showed him in every hand-up, in every quick save in a battle gone wrong, every time he rested with ease while Dean took watch – was never letting the bitterness well in the first place.